How strange can a language be?

It's really strange that:
There is no egg in an eggplant. It doesn't look or taste like an egg.
There is no ham in a hamburger.
There is no pine nor apple in a pineapple.
Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
English muffins were not invented in England and French fries were not invented in France, so where did such names come from?

Some names seem to describe the opposite of what the things really are:
Quicksand pulls you down slowly.
Boxing rings are square.
A Guinea pig is not from Guinea and it is not a member of the pig family.

Some examples of why you cannot blindly follow English grammar rules:
If writers write and painters paint and riders ride, then why don't fingers fing or hammers ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth and the plural of goose is geese, then shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth and the plural of moose be meese? Maybe they should be, but they aren't.
If the teacher taught, why didn't the preacher praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what do you think a humanitarian eats?
How can a house that is burning up finally end in being burned down?
At a bank or loan office, how can you fill in the necessary information as you fill out the forms?
Why is it that when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible?
Why do people recite at a play, yet play at a recital?
Why do people park on driveways but drive on parkways?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

Answer: I simply don't know.